Monday, October 27, 2025

Flourishing in our Friendships

by Pastor Joey Asher

In a biblical sense true friendship is more than just longevity or seeing each other weekly

It talks about laying down of one's life

Flourish - How life is meant to be

How many of us have true friends we can count on and not friends we can count?

Does connectedness means closeness?

Yes we're friendly with one another but not closeness.

We can be surrounded by people and still alone. We're comfortable with surfaced acquaintances and not comfortable to make ourselves vulnerable....

True friends ensure good and hard times, runs deeper and a lot more intentional

Big idea:
True friendship reflects God's covenantal love and helps us flourish in community

Have we confuse Connectivity with community?

What kind of friendship do we really need?
How do we actually build this friendship?

1 Samuel 18:1-4
After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself. 2 From that day Saul kept David with him and did not let him return home to his family. 3 And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. 4 Jonathan took off the robe he was wearing and gave it to David, along with his tunic, and even his sword, his bow and his belt.


True friendship is tested by adversity and attested to by sacrifice

"Love' in this message is not between husband/wife, parents/children but of frienship love

Jonathan allegience to David was to God's purposes and not his own purposes

Covenantal friendship is about loyal allegience, first to God then to each other

Symbols of kingship:
- Jonathan Robe symbolise royal status
- Jonathan Armor marked him as heir to king saul throne

When we isolate ourselves we not only experience loneliness but also denying each other to how God's love for us

True friendship is marked by sacrificial love - a love that seeks the other person's good above your own

Proverbs 17:17
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.


The true test of friendship is hardship

Proverbs 17:17 encourage us to Be constant in every season

Build Kingdom friendships that goes beyond spouses, parents and children.

Going deeper is tough

We keep our guard up

Go beyond superficial

by doing that then we no longer share prayer request on value terms

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: 10 If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. 11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? 12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.


1. True friendship produces greater fruitfulness
Ecclesiastes 4:9 (because they have a good reward for their toil)

2. True friendship lifts us up when we stumble
Ecclesiastes 4:10 (for if they fall, one will lift up his fellow)

3. True friendship comforts us in hardship
Ecclesiastes 4:12 (again, if two lie together they keep warm)

4. True friendship helps us stand firm together
Ecclesiastes 4:12 (a threefold cord is not quickly broken)

Ecclesiastes 4:10
Isolation isn't just painful but dangerous, and makes us vulnerable

Jonathan friendship with David foreshadowed the ultimate covenant friend

John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.


1 John 4:19
We love because he first loved us.


Kingdom friendships transform how we befriend each other because we moved from...
# minding our own business to gentle involvement
# transactional to covenantal friendships
# isolated to intentional relationships

If you let things happen naturally, nothing happens naturally

We have a chance to change the script






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